(VOVworld) – The Ha Nhi are no longer bound by feudal rites and ethics. Young Ha Nhi people are now allowed to date before marriage. Today VOV introduces the Ha Nhi’s dating customs and wedding ceremony.

Ha Nhi men and women dance and sing

Young Ha Nhi men and women often go to festivals to seek partners. It’s a custom that when a young man and a woman like each other, they cover themselves with a blanket and to talk and sing together. A man of the Black Ha Nhi in Bat Xat district, Lao Cai province, blankets himself, walks to the house of the girl he likes, and invites her to come outside for a private conversation.
Lý Mờ Xá says: “I have to blanket myself and walk alone to the girl’s house many nights. We talk to learn more about each other. We met each other at a New Year festival. If we didn’t meet previously I couldn’t date her now.”

A marriageable Ha Nhi man will call at a girl’s house to ask her out. He brings a blanket with him. At the gate of the girl’s house, the boy blankets himself and walks in to meet the girl. If the girl’s parents say nothing, the man takes her out of her house. 

They play games at festival

Cao Si May of Bat Xat district says: “The girl’s parents leave the couple alone to talk. If the girl likes the man, she will stay out later. If not, she can return at any time. They appreciate the blanket because it’s very cold at night in the mountains.”

The custom of blanketing gives young people an opportunity to talk. But if the girl becomes pregnant before marriage, the couple faces serious social consequences. She has to leave the village until the man marries her and take her back to the village.

A Ha Nhi wedding is simple. Cao Si May talks about old wedding customs: “The groom’s family prepares a rooster as an offering to inform their ancestors of the marriage. Sometimes the bride’s parents are not informed of the wedding ceremony. The groom takes the bride to his home for a wedding ceremony and invites his relatives and friends to a party. The next day they inform the girl’s parents of their marriage.”

Lately the Ha Nhi have begun to adopt more modern wedding procedures. The lovers tell their parents that they want to get married. The groom invites a matchmaker to make a proposal to the bride’s family. The matchmaker goes back and forth between the two families 3 times to give the bride a wedding gift and decide on a wedding day.

The Ha Nhi organize a 2^nd wedding ceremony on their 50^th or 60^th wedding anniversary when they already have many children. The 2^nd wedding is a way to strengthen family bonds.